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Attack of the Clones

Somehow it turned out to be even worse than what I’ve imagined.


From Obi Wan jumping through a window to clutch to a drone, to awkward dialogs.

And why Natali is dressed as a dominatrix?

It is incredible how unimaginative that thing is. Including diner from the US sixties.
The CGI has improved, but it went into that uncanny valley.
The only good part is the final battle between droid and clone armies. And it comes at 2:00:00, which means a lot.

It’s a WW2 kind of battle, with two rows of tanks and infantry clashing together. But at least this is not the awkward middle-age battle from Episode 1. There is a breef moment of clones fighting in a dust cloud that still looks good to this day. But it is brief and fleeting and a moment in a 2-hour long horror.


What else did they manage to ruin? Sword fights. Yeah, you know, one of the staples of Star Wars. Well, those were never actually good. Bust somehow, Anakin and Count Doku waving their swords above the heads made it even worse. Worse that CGI Yoda jumping around.

I’m happy I’m done with it. But wouldn’t wish this to anyone else. It’s very hard for me to decide which is worse: Attack of the Clones or Phantom Menace. But I would say based on the horrible acting that Attack of the Clones takes the lead for now.