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Love Death & Robots

I think we finished Season 1 of Love Death & Robots now.
Witness – while the animation was somewhat impressive, I felt like the story tries to be explicit for the sake of explicit ness. Or maybe I’m not a fan of such time loops / paradoxes
Good Hunting – absolutely fantastic, breaks expectations multiple times in 15 minutes. Chinese steam punk, Witcher, Battle Angel Alita, it has it all.
Dump – mostly funny. Liked the frog/dog monster made of trash
Suits – looks like someone has been playing Into the Breach too much . Tons of good mech action
Shape-Shifters – feels like watching a game trailer for some reason, with ideas taken from Werewolf: Apocalypse universe. Very brutal, but feels trite
Fish Night – tries to be sci-fi, but I dunno, hasn’t impressed me much
Helping Hand – like “Gravity”, but better, because it doesn’t have Sandra Bullock in it
Alternate Histories – another one that tries to be funny, but I got tired of its jokes even if this was just 10 minutes
Lucky 13 – a bit like Helping Hand, not really a sci-fi, and a bit like Shape-Shifters in animation style. Story of a helicopter pilot and a helicopter that is slightly smart
Blindspot – mix of Battle Angel Alita and Mad Max.

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Love, Death & Robots

Love, Death & Robots turned out to be a fantastic discovery. It’s a collection of sci-fi animated shorts, about 10-20 minutes each. So we can decide how many to watch each time.
I roughly divide those animations into two: “funny” and “scary”.
Just to keep track of what we watched so far:

Beyond the Aquila Rift – scary, with some Dead Space vibes.
Three Robots – funny, Pixar-like
Ice Age – funny, and mostly live-action, with just a bit of CG
Zima Blue – a very strong classical sci-fi. Made me break a tear
Sonnie’s Edge – cyberpunk Pokemon and Dishonored. Absolutely brilliant
Secret War – technically brilliant, with a nice side twist, but a bit hollow
When the Yogurt Took Over – another funny one
Sucker of Souls – this one couldn’t decide if it wants to be funny or scary. Some inventive animation tricks, like splitting of the Korean student, but overall, one of the weakest yet

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Shadow and Bone S01

During the flight last week, I finished watching the first season of Shadow and Bone.
British actors cosplaying the Russian Imperial Army? Not as bad as it sounds.
The main plotline is that some time ago a dark mage has created The Fold, which is basically a Chernobyl-like zone full of flying monsters. This Fold is stuck in between multiple countries, and each country needs a way to find a way across it and not to be eaten by monsters.

The better part is that there are more than two sides to the conflict, more than two countries in this world. There’s Ravka, the “Tzarist Russia” that uses mages, there’s some kind of Skandinavish country that hunts them because that’s their religion, there’s England/Netherlands (Ketterdam) and also some Ravkan separatists. And Shu, which is Asians, as Indian Sulu.


The characters and dialogues are quite good. Except for the main heroine, who is basically a Messiah. Foretold by legends, with a unique gift, that would change the world. Honestly, I wish she would just stay a cartographer.


The main problem is that the plotline quickly slides into “Girl picking between Her Childhood Sweetheart and a Dark but Handsome General Mage”. Also, there is a lot of time spent on that magician that can conjure clothes and makeup. I kid you not.

I also liked that the series doesn’t try to preserve characters too much, offing them rather quickly sometimes.
The costume work is impressive, and actors play surprising well, compared to some horrendous works from Wheel of Time. Someone also paid serious attention to the fighting scenes, so those don’t look like people pulling each other’s arms.

Finally, the humor is not spectacular, but it will do:

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Return of the King

It becomes a good tradition to finish watching an awesome movie or TV series before a flight.
This time we finished Lord of the Rings trilogy.

The battle scenes still send shivers down the spine, even 20 years after.

Didn’t remember that Faromir survives the skirmish. Also, I didn’t remember Mouth of Sauron  at all. Looks like someone from Guillermo del Toro movies.

I liked elephant riders. They looked like someone who is enjoying doing their job well.


I tried not to dwell too much on why Legolas have that feat of climbing up a running elephant, while all the other elves are rather… unremarkable.

The amount of work that went into the orcs in this film is simply astonishing. They are all very distinct and different. Absolutely amazing.

I also liked that moment of astonishment on trolls face. This is literally just a second. Marvel at the amount of attention to details:

When the eagles flew in, I almost cried, for real. It was so moving.

Not sure if that was the intention even 20 years ago, but Merry and Pippin sure look like a gay couple in some of the scenes:

And Frodo evacuation scene looks like helicopter airlift:

When the four hobbits are sitting back in the Green Dragon pub, they look like four war veterans with PTSD.

And when Frodo later in his home, he looks like someone with depression and deeply suicidal.

All those notes aside, this was a fantastic experience. I’m glad we started it.

 

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Two Towers

Finished watching Lord of the Rings: Two Towers.
There are a few weird elements to it, but I think this comes mostly from the original book. We know that Gandalf falls down with Balrog. But then he tells a story how he fought with it on the mountain peak, and after that was reborn. And he has a new staff. This doesn’t make any sense.

Also, Merry and Pippin drink some water, and then Pippin grows taller. And they are almost killed by a tree? What?

Gollum still looks absolutely fantastic. Which cannot be said about Jar Jar Binks from the same time.


Two of the most impressive roles are Eowyn and Theoden. Great range of emotion, fantastic acting.



Arwen is much more boring and flat, in comparison.

Orc talking like and old British man unhappy with his tea or the weather is a bit strange:

Frodo in this movie becomes Jesus with some anger management issues. Again, I think this is more the problem of the original book than the movie.

Fight with wargs looks great. Helm’s Deep is even better. I don’t remember when was the last time I was so moved by a movie battle.

Even the orc olympian didn’t stop me from enjoying it:

There are some weird parts: Legolas surfing down the stairs on a shield, Aragorn throwing Gimli across the bridge, but overall it’s fantastic. Also, I didn’t remember how important was the role of the ents in this battle. Ents are like the UN. It takes them a lot of time to decide anything.

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Jarhead

Military drama about boredom and loneliness, two elements that are abundant in any army.

Its probably best known for its entry sequence featuring a drill sergeant, and quite similar to “Full Metal Jacket”. Albeit it’s much more ironical.
It’s an interesting perspective on infantry being redundant in modern wars. At one point, Peter Sarsgaard character points out that by the time they finished digging out trenches, the frontline has moved miles away.

And the climax of the film being two snipers sent to snipe two Iraqi officers, and USAF bombing the entire area before they can score a single shot, all their training wasted.

There are some fantastic performances, one by Jamie Foxx (Django Unchained), and another by Brian Geraghty (the kidnapper from Big Sky).
A lot of the reviews talk about how boring and unexiciting the whole movie is. That’s exactly the point.

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Revenge of the Sith

It gets worse and worse. But each time, it’s worse in a different way.

Why are Jedis suddenly also ace pilots? Why droids shoot missiles that explode into smaller droids that try to break your ship, instead of, you know, exploding, and killing you right away?


There’s a weird scene where a hit starship falls down. And everyone in it falls down too. While the former can be explained by the fact that they fight in the atmosphere, there’s no fucking explanation for the latter. Except that Star Wars is just WWII in space.

All those interactions between R2 and other droids would be fun, except Anakin just cut off the hands of an old man, then decapitated him.


You can break a starship glass by throwing… a spear at it?! Sounds dangerous!
Seems like the whole Darth Grievous plotline didn’t have any meaning at all. Him coughing all the time didn’t affect anything, Obi Wan dealt with four lightsabers quite easily, and the whole Darth Sidius vs Mazafaka Jedi encounter happened not because of Grievous being killed, but because Palpatine told to Anakins face that he’s the Sith Lord.


The only good episode is “Order 66”. And it’s just about 5 minutes long. Sending just two clones to kill Yoda, though? I would expect some orbital bombardment. Since when clone is a major treat to a Jedi?

Obi Wan and Yoda fly in and kill clones at the Temple just for the fun of it, it seems, while “investigating stuff”.


Darth Sidius constantly calling Darth Vader “Lord Vader” doesn’t make any sense either. First, he outranks him, Vader is his padawan. And second, there are just two of them at that point!


The whole last half hour is extremely sloppy. Lucas had years to come up with how those different characters ended up where they ended up. And he came up with… nothing. Yoda just declares he’s going into exile. Padme dying without any reason, just “loosing her will to live”. And Death Star already in progress, because? There are no Rebels at that point.
Oh, and Obi Wan can speak with his dead master… Why is that important?
Finally, can we talk about Obi Wan cutting Vader’s arm and both legs with a single hit? And Sidius having the entire Vader’s outfit ready.

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Fellowship of the Ring

Another trilogy I have never thoughtfully watched is Lord of the Rings.

And unlike Star Wars, it held the test of time extraordinary well. Even the fights still look pretty solid. Especially the fight with the troll.
Since it’s 12 hours long in total, we’re watching it like a series, one hour at a time. And this works pretty well.
One detail I didn’t remember is that in the first movie Gollum isn’t actually shown. We see his hands and eyes a couple of times, and characters talk about him a lot, but we never see him directly.


Rivendale always confused me. It looks like a nursing home for elves, or an elven hotel.
The sheer aesthetics of some scenes is amazing.

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Attack of the Clones

Somehow it turned out to be even worse than what I’ve imagined.


From Obi Wan jumping through a window to clutch to a drone, to awkward dialogs.

And why Natali is dressed as a dominatrix?

It is incredible how unimaginative that thing is. Including diner from the US sixties.
The CGI has improved, but it went into that uncanny valley.
The only good part is the final battle between droid and clone armies. And it comes at 2:00:00, which means a lot.

It’s a WW2 kind of battle, with two rows of tanks and infantry clashing together. But at least this is not the awkward middle-age battle from Episode 1. There is a breef moment of clones fighting in a dust cloud that still looks good to this day. But it is brief and fleeting and a moment in a 2-hour long horror.


What else did they manage to ruin? Sword fights. Yeah, you know, one of the staples of Star Wars. Well, those were never actually good. Bust somehow, Anakin and Count Doku waving their swords above the heads made it even worse. Worse that CGI Yoda jumping around.

I’m happy I’m done with it. But wouldn’t wish this to anyone else. It’s very hard for me to decide which is worse: Attack of the Clones or Phantom Menace. But I would say based on the horrible acting that Attack of the Clones takes the lead for now.

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Godless

Haven’t seen anything as methodical in ages. Completely stunned. Maybe that’s due to the fact that it is a miniseries, so they didn’t have to leave any hanging plotlines. But maybe that’s why I love miniseries format so much: it allows for somewhat slower pace and character development on one hand, but doesn’t deteriorate into “who dates who” as most of the regular series do.
This is a strange twist on a classical Western. On one hand, you have sheriffs, bandits and people shoot each other from the hip. At one point character even shoots the head of a badly rendered snake. On the other, you have cowboys do some cowboy stuff: like actually care about horses, and not treat them like some meaty bikes. Here horses are something expensive (Alice can move to Boston after selling hers), that need training (or breaking) and constant care. Care themes are very strong here in general. One of the main characters is punished for not caring for his daughter by “loosing his shadow”. Now here the series allow some level of ambiguity: you can view it as him losing his eyesight due to his drinking habit, after his wife died giving birth to the aforementioned daughter, or a punishment by some gods. Same is with the Indian that accompanies Bill. Roy might have pulled Bill’s leg by saying that he saw the man drown with his dog. Or maybe he, same as Bill, was just able to see “the other side”, because he came too close to it on a number of occasions.
Speaking of which, to bury a treasure in a grave is a Western classic. But here grave is were Roy Goode “dies”, and humble Ward is “born” (wearing other clothes). Then, Roy Goode is reborn again in the same grave.
Frank Griffin quotes his adoptive father, (and also the killer of his family) that “America is a godless country”. God in his case is the moral judge. And if there is no God, there is no one to judge him, and he can do whatever he pleases. And that in the most literal meaning: Griffin’s actions are not all destructive, because he is a complete chaotic, acting on a whim.
The final episode is a huge tribute to Tarantino. Which is of course ironic, since Tarantinogave a lot of tribute to westerns in his movies. From a charged literally “guns under the table scene” to almost a Biblical Armageddon, with bits of wood flying everywhere, and horse galloping into the hotel foyer (one can also see Gog and Magog as some kind of evil twins).
Another Tarantino trick is a Babylonian mix of languages: English, Paiute, Norwegian, German, often miscaptioned on purpose, so the spectators would understand as much as characters. Which is not much.
Another interesting element: the preacher, that some of the townsfolk were waiting for, arrives only Frank is dead. We as spectators had some doubts that he even existed, with Whitey reassuring the simple girl that the preacher is on his way as an act of kindness. But he’s here. Just not very helpful, except when you need some condolences.
Finally, a lesbian plotline that makes a lot of sense in the context the series was building (men letting women down). And this time, doesn’t feel forced at all.
What about the bees that fly around Frank? I saw bees as Samsonian Lion bees, “the king is dead” sign. But maybe those are just Christian bees, as “all insects are evil, yes, including snails and frogs”.
And it’s funny how Roy is literally “riding into the sunset” and the end.

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Phantom Menace

I’ve seen Phantom Menace maybe once, long time ago, and most probably in bad quality and Russian translation. So I’ve decided to fix that. I managed to watch through it almost in one go. But it was pretty bad.


There is some pretty bad acting. Especially Anakins mother.
Strange British accents in a galaxy far far away.
Jedi trying to jumpstart a submarine like it’s some car from the eighties.
Battle between droids and the frog people is more like a medieval battle, with rows of soldiers marching into rows of shields, and catapults. Also, it’s weird how droids need to communicate with words and gestures. Just weird.
The battle between Maul and Jedi’s is still pretty good. Although it’s obvious Maul is looking at the lightsaber to make sure it passes above his head. Confused me though that a stab from a lightsaber is just that, a stab from a pointy stick. Not sure why they had a generator room open just under the palace. I would close the door, at least?
Also, Anakin blowing the cruiser by mistake, because he flew there on an autopilot, and the main reactor just happened to be in the hangar? Just a very lazy writing.

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Death Comes to Pemberley

Детективный минисериал. Причем от части комедийный, от части исторический. И вообще как мы узнали позже, это spinoff “Pride and Prejudice”.
Вместо мрачного Лондона тут загородное поместье. В лесу близ поместья убивают английского офицера. Подозрение падает на сводного брата хозяина поместья. Тот достал всю семью, но если его осудят, будет еще хуже. The family will loose their Good Name.
За три серии успевают представить кучу персонажей, большая часть которых вообще никакого значения не имеют. Тут и старшая сестра героини, и ее отец с матерью, и ее сын, и конюх с женой. И это не считая той дюжины персонажей, которые для повествования важны.

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American Factory

Feel sorry for all the workers in this documentary. American workers earn 27K$ a year. Chinese workers get to see their children once a year, and have two weekends a month. Most of the American managers were quickly replaced with Chinese managers that don’t argue with the CEO. CEO himself is a strange blend of brutal capitalism, superstition and подобострастие before the Communist Party. One of the cringiest moments is him having a portraits of himself, and arguing where a fire alarm should be placed.
Chinese workers have a hymn dedicated to the company, and events where different departments have to dance and sing praising the company. Company workers also get married during the same event. Although the later may be considered a benefit?
Would it be better if GM wouldn’t close its factory? I don’t know. GMs cars were wasteful. Would it be better if Fuyao wouldn’t open it’s factory at all? I don’t know. People in Ohio spent years unemployed. But then they were also not injured at work, I guess?

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House of Gucci

Wonderful acting by Lady Gaga. Even more wonderful Adam Driver.


Entire Paulo Gucci plotline is completely inaccurate. He wasn’t incompetent, as is constantly demonstrated in the movie, and he was actually the designer for Gucci for 15 years. He was the one to design the Gucci’s famous logo.

 

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Loki S01

Досмотрел первый сезон Loki.
Начался сезон откровенно слабо, но последние две серии кое-как вырулили.
В нем всего 6 серий, даже не 8. И это хорошо. Сначала даже не понял, где следующая.
Интересно, что это первая большая роль Sylvie. В 38 лет.
Экшен тут позорнейший. Но вот диалоги местами неплохи.

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Power of the Dog

Все герои говорят какие-то бессвязные фразы, и совершают один упоротый поступок за другим. Больше всего мне это напомнило отвратительнейший There Will Be Blood.
История ковбоя – латентного гомосека. Ковбой настоящий. Тот, который пасет коров, а не тот, который стреляет в людей от бедра.
Его брат женится на вдове, которая начинает пить. Сначала ковбой зло подкалывает и ее, и ее сына-подростка, который тоже гомосек, но скрывает это куда хуже. Но в итоге он даже кажется проникается к последнему, и пытается сделать из него мужчину. В прямом смысле, а не то, что вы подумали.
Если тема ковбоев-гомосеков кажется вам знакомой, это вовсе не спроста. Автор Brokeback Mountain вдохновлялась именно Power of the Dog.

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Loki S01

Taking some of my words back. By the half of the season Loki turns out into a romantic comedy about two middle aged people that try to figure out if they can live together and trust each other. Which is kind of sweet. Also weird, since they are basically clones of each other.
But at least they admit that it’s weird.

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King (2019)

Невероятно крутой фильм. Последний раз меня в такой восторг привел Upgrade, кажется.


Крут тем, как показывает поединок рыцарей: две “консервные банки”, которые долбят друг друга мечами. Тем, что все эти принцы убивающие друг друга – сущие мальчишки.


Хорошо показана дипломатия. Когда все присылают подарки, а король Франции присылает только мячик – это оскорбление, или еще нет? А когда подсылает убийцу, это уже повод начать войну, или еще нет?
Неожиданно прекрасен Pattinson известный всем по Twilight. Вообще, все сцены с французами интересны тем, что диалоги ведутся попеременно на английском и французском.


Собственно Agincourt, классическая битва, больше всего похож на бой с Болтоном из Game of Thrones. Давка консервных банок в грязи.

И даже развязка не подкачала.

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Loki S01

Казалось бы, Legion мне хорошо зашёл, так что и облизанный всеми Loki должен. Но нет.

В Legion’е было довольно серьезное повествование, которое скрывалось под буфонадой. Тут же это просто буфонада. И самоповторение. Стилистика 50ых не спасает, игра Локи не спасет, ничто не спасает.

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Witcher S02

Досмотрели второй сезон Witcher’а.

Меня уже даже не смущает, что Melitele превратили в какую-то Lakshmi, а ее жриц в индусок. Но почему выкинув в трубу большую часть книг, они оставили шутку про чучело единорога?

Шутки шутками, но финальные две серии удались. Тут тебе и White Flame, и Wild Hunt, и прекрасная игра Freya Allan, которая просто превзошла себя.